PHOTOGRAPHS

I love the way everyone shows up a smile while posing for pictures. All worries, woes, anxieties, pain forgotten in a jiffy. For pretence comes in so naturally even when it comes to freezing the past.
           Aberrantly I have always wished for life to be confined only up till picture albums. Vehemently wishing that the joyful facade we effortlessly put up, sinks into our daily lives. That sugar coated captions work effectively whenever anything goes out of way. Oh, but aren't albums long lost just like our happiness, the phone galleries successfully replacing like plastic smiles we put up every day?


              

FADED HORIZON 🌌

She was a perfect embodiment of light and hope and every night she loved to gaze at the night sky, fascinate the tiny sparks and wait desperately for a shooting star. A beautiful intermingling of darkness and light lured her more than anything. Staring at nothing she found everything. A magnificent bewitchment where gleams of light overrule darkness at times to form a beautiful image, a constellation, because hope too has similar traits. Wouldn't light and hope have lost the battle long ago in absence of darkness and despair?
             As she survived every night, she evolved bit by bit. And then she glowed the brightest that night as everyone's eyes reflected her light, as she was one and complete.
            She was the moon.
       

Be Free, Be Proud!

The guy next door, happens to giggle insolently evertime he stamps over me. Your mother takes enough precautionary measures to wrap me tight with an opaque substance.
                       Yeah! I am a "tampon", a "sanitary napkin" and I demand to know the reasons that I have been shamed for.

     Peek-a-boo. If you get to sneak a glance at me. Your hormones start playing their part. The blood boils in your veins, like a ripe potion in a cauldron. The TV commercials publicising me seem to have an adverse affect on you.
                Yes! I am a "bra". A part of every girl's attire. 
         This isn't something which aims to elevate your romanticising thoughts. It is a silent cry from every girl and woman who is being looked down upon for going through a normal monthly procedure. Such an irony, a girl is being shamed for going through her 'period' while if she isn't on one, she is being cursed as an 'infertile rag'.
        This is an infuriated charge from every girl, who is being eyed hungrily from every man looking at her chest. This is even more shameful for a man than a girl going through her 'period'.
This Women's Day live yourself, free yourself and help yourself.

Of coincidences and serendipities!?

To the scorching daylight, 
In anticipation  that it would be soothing someday.
To the random pencil strokes,
In want of a perfect masterpiece.
To the ear deafening chaos,
In search of a beautiful melody amongst it.
To the frustrating rush-hour traffic,
In need of stealing delightful moments between them.
To the selfish stone -hearted crowd, 
In greed of a selfless, lovable person amidst it.
To the damaged and dusty books of the storeroom,
In hope of grasping the perfect novel.
To all the torn and unsent letters,
That someday they will find the person addressed to.
To the lonely, creepy and dark street I get lost in,
In hope that it might lead to you.
Will all this be just a play of coincidences and serendipities? 

Don't worry, it's love

It's my first collaboration with a friend of mine named Rohan Suresh.  The first half holds my thoughts while the second is his is reflection. I hope you all like it. All your suggestions are welcome.

It is heavenly yet devilish. It's vulnerable still remains unbreakable. It might be self-demolishing yet self-satisfying. It can be confined yet sets you free. Its letting go of yet holding on to. It's momentous but forever. Out of sight but it isn’t out of mind.

                   The feeling when you smile fatuously with absolutely no reason. The chilly breath which you take on a cold wintry morning. Those steps when taken increase your heartbeat abnormally and you start freaking out. It's when you are aware that your falling but still can't hold back onto, that excitement of something good which stokes up with each passing day. It's that rose which you need in spite of its thorns which poke you several times. It's the fresh water you drink every day without which survival is impossible. It's the first thing to cross your mind even when on an extremely busy schedule. It's the craving you have for your favorite chocolate. It’s the warmth you feel when you hug your closest friend after years. It’s okay. It's love.

Yes, love it is. True, won’t argue. But let not the beautiful imagery cloak the darker truth.

The gushes of wind fail to overpower the storm that brews within you. The leaves that rustled with zephyrs now float in vacuum. The rose petals you so long held onto despite the thorns now drip drops of blood and trust. The elixir that once quenched your thirst now poisons your bloodstream with hatred and betrayal. Clouds that once blessed you with sun rays now shower rain that drenches you with obliviousness. The same mind that once dreamt of peaceful future now gives birth to anarchy. The cravings you so long had now turn to desire for death. The only warmth you now feel is that of the fire that you have ignited for redemption. The only company you want is that of the man with the scythe. It’s okay. It’s the unrequited love. But, yeah, it’s love.

Broken

'Its over', she said and walked away furiously. While the boy stood dumbstruck the girl didn't look back as she hid the hot tears that welled up in her eyes.
      She skipped dinner and medicines for she was too engrossed in his thoughts. It had been 3 years since their relationship had begun, like any cliche high school love story. Eyes glowed, smiles exchanged and their hearts skipped a beat. While their friends couldn't stop teasing them, their puppy love grew wings. 
        Many chocolates were exchanged and the girl's drawer still had the chocolate wrappers carefully folded and kept away safely. The mails exchanged once upon a time made the girls inbox full. As years passed they grew and the relationship became a major part of their life. Nights spent chatting, making love notes for each other. Days spent video calling, thinking of creative ideas for each of their birthdays. Bike rides was her favourite part, as she could lean on to him, hold him tight as she cherished every moment.
                When the girl had been unwell, the boy had sneaked into the hospital, just to see her for once. The girl had bunked several tutions just to meet him. They had crossed hurdles,went against their family and school and yet kept their relationship intact .
                      They talked of the massive event that was about to enter their lives. High school was to end and they were to enter Higher Secondary. As their school uniforms were made different, their relationship started taking a new turn.
             Months later the girl broke up. She was busted, when she heard that they guy had been cheating on her with her new made friend. She had to walk away. Now each night she wet her pillow and each day she grew more and more lonely..
                           For the world she became stone hearted and yet inside her heart had been shattered into tiny little pieces where each piece bore his name. She attended parties with her swollen red eyes carefully covering them up with Kohl, and her lips held a plastic smile. It felt as if she stood still while the whole wide world revolved.
                     Few weeks later, her ears came upon the news that the guy had crashed into another girl. Yet her social networking site search box, held his name on the top. Her wardrobe reminded her of the dress she had worn on their first anniversary. Her teacher's pathetic handwriting reminded her of his writing. It was not him but the memories they had made that haunted her. She realised that as the years had preceded his loyalty had depreciated. 
                         Its funny that realisation takes a jiffy while the acceptance of the fact takes years. Today she holds head high, not in search of any prince charming, but in search of her own self, whom she had long left some years back. Realisation had taken its toll and acceptance was slowly dooming on her. Even though people judged her. She knew what she wanted as she had to live her life not others. The things we do in adolescence are not meant to be continued when we realise them as mistakes. Her eyes glowed, but this time with the want of a new start a fresh start, as she  stepped onto back in her life.
   

We don't talk anymore...

Each and everyday without you my friend becomes unbearable.... I don't know where to start from... You might think am too puerile,  but only if you knew how much I miss you every single day. I am still taken aback by the fact that we're not best of friends anymore, like how could such a fucking thing happen??
             Do you recall the days we had spent planning each other's wedding, the groovy plans we had made.... Talking about each detail from the wedding dress to destination to photography... And yes I had promised you to be your personal photographer. Doesn't anything remind you of me ? Did you completely forget our plan of buying sarees together for our farewell day??  Am I the only one who misses you...
    We have had our differences before too but we acted mature enough to keep them aside, and I don't know what broke our friendship this time. Maybe it's because of our communication and your friendly feelings have faded away for me or it  might be that both of us were too busy in our present lives that we didn't even feel the need to peep and ask about each other's day. Yes, I know you have a great number of friends who value you a lot and your everyone's favourite and perhaps you don't even know if I exist or not. My heart tears apart on the  mere thought that this letter might not ever reach you. I don't have the guts to speak all of this to you, as you have always known, I was never too fluent in expressing my feelings to anyone.
        People might tell me loads of not-so-good things  about you never accepting me as your best friend, and that you don't deserve my  friendship, but my heart simply doesn't accept this.  I have always accepted you as my family member, a part of me and how could one ever start hating a part of oneself so easily. You might dislike me, hate me and be it so.. But I can only dislike you to a certain limit, or perhaps only be angry on you. Let me tell you that I can never hate you dear ex-best friend. Never ever...
    It's pretty strange that we still see each other every single day but unlike other times we don't stop to share our feelings, but simply ignore each other or end up with a formal talk.
              We had promised on bring friends forever. Our fb walls speak loud of our never-to-die friendship.  You still have your profile picture with me captioned as "Besties?... Naah, were more like sisters..." My cover still has you in the focus. My phone gallery containes pictures of us in every weird expression one could ever think of.. Each of our houses are filled with best friend wishes.... But only, the feelings are missing...
Dear ex-best friend I might never be able to tell you this, but I miss you.. A lot, every single time, every single day, every single moment. If only we could turn back time to what it was before... If only....