Standing on the small balcony of her house,
on a rainy evening, a million memories flashed across her mind. A million
memories of laughter, joy, sorrow, tears and separation. Thirteen years of
school life had ‘they’ shared together. Thirteen years, this gave her crazy
moments, innumerable memories, peals of laughter and also unstoppable tears.
The more she thought about ‘him’, the more flooded her eyes.
She recalled the fun
moments, he and she had shared as partners in class, laughing and teasing each
other. Though a strong girl, she had a weakness. Her weakness was him. She
couldn’t recall the exact moment when she started feeling for him; perhaps it
was a long time ago. Slowly and gradually, she realizes her feelings for him.
Even before she had realized, the news spread like a wildfire in the whole
class. A wall of misunderstanding grew between them. The class laughed at her,
mocked her, insulted and abused her, so did he. For the first time she
realized, that even outer looks were necessary for a girl, for a boy to feel
for a girl.
Misunderstandings
grew, and so the boy and the girl stopped talking to each other. Now, the girl,
spent every single wakeful moment of her life, thinking about him, brooding
over the fact, that she had lost his precious friendship.
A year passed soon it
was the last year of the school; she had the good fortune of becoming his
partner yet again. They started talking, laughing, and sharing stupid jokes and
thus they became friends again. The girl felt as if she had her whole world at
her feet. She needed nothing more to stay happy, his friendship meant
everything to her.
As ill luck would
have it, a sudden awkwardness drifted them apart, and thus they stopped talking
again. They were no more partners in class. The boy got annoyed at her presence
and made rude comments at her. The girl had nothing to do except to shed tears.
Her best friend made comments like, “Go get a life, girl.”
The girl only grew depressed
and sobbed, whenever she was alone. That year passed. Even on the last day of
the school she didn’t have the courage to speak to him. After the examinations,
it was time for the boy to leave that city and get shifted to a new city
‘forever.’
The thought of never
being able to see him again made her cry more and more. She thought about
‘them’ a lot, even though ‘them’ never existed. Sometimes, she spent her time,
angrily questioning the Almighty, as to why had he given her such days. She
spent her nights awake thinking only about him.
The class had
arranged a farewell party in which she was also called upon to attend. She
wanted to see him for the last time before he left, but an unexplained fear
stopped her. Therefore she rejected the proposal. Finally at the day of the
farewell party, he texted her long sorry note. She spoke to him again after a
whole year. They spoke and cleared out their misunderstandings. Her heart felt
light and burden free after a long time.
The farewell party
meant so much to her. He welcomed her with a warm comforting smile. The party
ended with a song sung by him, the song that her ears would hold for a long
time to come. She realized that a huge gap had drawn them apart, and so she
interacted with him, only on a formal level.
She had so much to
tell to him. She wanted to let her heart out to him, wanted to tell him how
much he meant to her. However, an unexplained fear of losing his friendship
again stopped her. So she waved him an awkward goodbye for the last time, with
a huge smile on her face, even though she cried for him at heart.
On realizing, that he
had gone ‘forever’, she cried her heart out for him. It felt as if somebody had
hit her hard. It felt as if she had lost a piece of her heart. It felt as if
she had lost a precious thing of her life.
Now she only read and
reread his messages, recalled the moments they had shared together and looked
into the past photographs. She wondered why he meant so much to her, while she
meant nothing to him. She wondered as to why, feelings always need to be
labeled for the society. She knew the memories she had of would be enough to
remember him, and that her feelings would last for a long time to come.
Only a ray of hope
did she have, of meeting him somewhere in future. So strange a feeling is hope,
that it gives a being a true reason to
live and so did it give her and she knew that the ray of hope was ‘more than
enough’ for her.
